My name is Eugene. I’m a literary agent, aspiring writer and tortoise about town. I’ve been a bit lonely lately so I’ve decided to reach out to likeminded species through the internet. Because no one is lonely on the internet. I’ve just gone through a difficult break up, so I’ve been re-evaluating my life and values and I’ve realised that what I’d really like to do is evaluate other people’s work and make some new friends. I know there are lots of talented writers hiding in Norwich, perhaps skulking in rabbit holes or behind some foliage and I’d like you all to come out of your shells. I realise I just mixed my metaphors, but that’s ok because this is supposed to be a safe place to experiment. There are no rules! (Except for these rules, which I will set out for you.)
- Please make all submissions to firstname.lastname@example.org. Work should be double spaced and, unless it is integral to your piece, a standard size and font.
- There are no restrictions in terms of theme, genre or medium – I will be accepting prose, poetry, photography and illustration as well as puzzles. For prose please keep the word limit within 2,000. Anything above this will be serialised. For articles the word limit is 1,000.
- Please attach documents as (.doc) flies, and as high resolution jpegs for images.
- There will be standard feedback given for every submission, but I’m expecting to receive finished, proof-read pieces. If there are any minor adjustments or corrections then I will let you know and ask for your permission before making changes.
- Expect feedback within a week but, depending on how many submissions there are, it could be longer before your work appears on the blog.
- This blog should be a supportive environment in which to share work. Please keep comments to constructive criticism and the discussion of ideas.
- All comments will be moderated. I’m not a dictator, just a lowly tortoise hoping to preserve harmony.
I’m so looking forward to virtually meeting you and sharing a tumbler of Bushmills, although this will have to be in our respective cosy cottages as you can never be too careful these days. Admirers are appreciated but stalkers not so much, although I’m a sucker for a nice bunch of flowers please take your night-vision goggles elsewhere. Kids, you can never really be sure who anyone is on the internet; for all you know I could be a group of students collectively posing as an aging, melancholy tortoise.